The beginning

Trying to make sense in a world, (my world), (which, by the way, is oh-so-very small, relatively speaking). While all around me there is violence, death, war, and inexplicable atrocities going on, it certainly makes my particular world seem very simple. But, try living it, and (to me), it ranks right up there. I have three children, and how scary is that these days? One is 18, and on his own already. (Like he is ready for that!). One is 14, and so confused, and the third is 3>enough said. And to top is all off, I live with a man who is a manic-depressant and doesn't even know it. Do you know what it is like to walk on eggshells, so as not to trigger an outburst. Why do I live with it, because I financially have no way out. Plus the fear factor, he can be very scary, and has already threatened me if I were to leave. Sounds like an excuse. But what good is a restraining order. It only works after the fact. Not a chance I am willing to take for me or my kids. He won't get help, because he doesn't want to be dependent on pills. No, he would rather explode over tripping on a hot wheel car, scaring the crap out of everybody, then go take a pill. Yeah, my world may not be as bad as the next guys, but, for me it is a living hell.